I used a phrase in my last article, calling myself a “lifestyle entrepreneur”. I intentionally stated it, because I could feel the twinge of not wanting to.
The most common definition of lifestyle entrepreneur is someone who creates the life they want first, and then a business to serve that. As opposed to most traditional businesses, where the business consumes everything (often at great personal cost to the entrepreneur).
I clearly fall into the former description, with everything I’ve ever done. I’ve used entrepreneurship as a tool to help me achieve what it was that I wanted, but it was never “the thing” on its own. Sometimes I state this as: I’m an artist and one of the mediums I work in is entrepreneurship.
And, as a human being, I can fall into comparing myself with others. I love tech companies. I love and read entrepreneur websites, startup culture, innovators, people who get headlines and make news. Basically, a whole world I’m not a part of.
And when I’m not careful, it makes me feel small and insignificant in comparison. If I’m honest, I can feel like anyone describing themselves as a “lifestyle entrepreneur” is pretending to be one, compared to the “real” ones that are out there building (or attempting to build) billion dollar unicorns.
However, I noticed it this time. I was then able to go to a grounding statement that has changed my life:
The things that make me great I carry as secret shame.
If I feel shame around this, and this statement above is true, then what about the shame I feel around this topic actually makes me great?
The answers came quickly.
I’ve been living a life of freedom for decades. An uncompromised life. A life where I’m free to do what I want, when I want. A life where I’ve been free to reinvent myself many times over. To pursue new interests and challenges. A life that has given me everything I’ve ever wanted, and the wisdom to also know how much was “enough”, and the peace that comes with that.
A life that during my peak years in my 40s I’ve been able to spend healing and diving deep within myself. To write books and articles sharing my story with the world, and to let anyone interested grow and learn from hearing my story.
A life of freedom where I don’t need to be consumed with metrics about how many followers I have and focus on the individual people that have shown up.
To play games with rules of my own making, where I win the moment I decide to play them.
To give me space and time to explore “what’s next”, and find peace in the answer being “you’re looking at it.”
A life where I’ve been with my wife and partner for 25 years, and we find ways to up-level our relationship in ways that only become known to us as we reflect back.
A life where I’m the father I desire to be to my children, and there’s no version of me being a father that I wished I was.
A life where when I connect with someone on Zoom, I can tell them “you’re my ONE THING today”, because they are that important to me, and that’s the focus I want to give to them.
And as I’ve done before, I reformat that grounding sentence to the past tense:
The things that make me great, I carried as secret shame.
Because living an uncompromised life, of creating the lifestyle I want to live, using entrepreneurship as one of my tools, and operating from that place, makes me pretty freaking great. No shame here (not anymore). It’s from this place that I will create my next, greatest, chapter.
What is the most powerful takeaway for you, having watched me work my process right in front of you?
