“You’re polarizing, but I’m really into you”, I was told this by someone in my circle recently.
They didn’t mean it as an insult, and I didn’t take it that way, but it was an interesting comment to be on the receiving end of.
I sat with it for a moment, and then I realized how OK I was hearing it. There is nothing I’d want to do different about how I show up these days. I find moments of feeling proud of myself all the time. If I’m proud of myself, I don’t need someone else to validate me.
I don’t pretend to be anything I’m not. I do the things that excite me. Some people are really into that (you’re likely one of them, as a reader of this), and some people aren’t going to dig my vibe or energy or whatever it is I’m offering up, and that’s OK. I’m not what they are looking for.
I’m reminded back during my DJ days. I spun a style of music a lot of people actively disliked, or hated even. However, put me in the right room with the right audience and magic happened. I never worried about the haters, and only focused on the people in front of me. And in the end, the whole reason I became a DJ, was because I loved this music. I loved it so much I did everything I could to promote it and get it out there. Some people loved me and some people hated me. I was definitely polarizing then.
Nowadays, I see myself spinning a new kind of media. It doesn’t involve records this time, but I still make an impact. Whether it’s through my writing, my Zoom hosting and public speaking, creating powerful experiences with people, or simply “walking the walk” and modeling for others what is possible.
“Polarizing” is a byproduct of the impact I make. If I was making no impact, no one would feel anything about me. The more polarizing I am, the more impact I’m having. It’s a necessary byproduct of leaning into my edge and being true to myself. When I do that, there’s simply nothing more for me to do.
Trying to not polarize would be playing small for me, and that simply wouldn’t be fun.
Imagine letting go of your fears of pleasing everyone and being polarizing. Who benefits from that?
