“I’m out of here!”, my 12-year-old shouted.
“Kevin, there’s a freaking pandemic going on, we’re in lockdown!”, I responded back.
“I don’t care”, he replied.
“Kevin, I love you and will support you”, were the last words I said to him.
Kevin put on his jacket and walked out of the house. I had no idea where he was going to go.
Kevin had reached his breaking point with his Virtual School. He lacks motivation to be a part of it. He interprets the teacher as nagging him to do his work. He sees me as a jail warden forcing him to do work he doesn’t want to do. He simply couldn’t handle it anymore.
I had a Zoom scheduled to connect with someone minutes later. In my frazzled state I connected and disclosed what was going in. We agreed we’d reconnect when things are calm again.
I didn’t hesitate sharing what was going on with me at the start of the call. Every family has their challenges. I’ll never pretend to live a perfect life, because no one has one.
Kevin needs a regular class, to be around other kids, to be supported by staff that understand him. Zoom is not working.
I’ve already decided that if he has to repeat the 7th grade so be it. If we’re lucky, the kids will be back in school next September. He won’t be the only one that had a tough year.
Kevin’s challenges existed well before Covid-19. I’m used to getting the phone calls to come in because Kevin is having a meltdown.
Covid-19 has taken a situation where an already fragile kid went from little support to no support with his school and classes.
I don’t know the way through this. All I can do is my best.
This story is happening in real time. I started writing this article while Kevin was out of the house and he has since come back home. He’s feeling more calm now. We had a chat briefly. I told him to take the rest of the morning off and we’ll have a longer chat before his lunch break ends to figure out what to do next.
“I love you”, he said, as I left the kitchen table.
“I love you too”, I responded and gave him a hug.
I commended him on navigating his meltdown today in a way that didn’t involve breaking anything or hurting anyone. That is progress. One step at a time, during the hardest of times.
I know this won’t be my last incident with Kevin. We’re still in the middle of it. There will be more interrupted calls for me in the future when I will have to disclose that my family obligations have taken over.
And you know what? That’s ok.
How might you be served revealing the challenges you are dealing with with your own audience?
